I Am Emily Cratchit/Miss Piggy in The Muppet Christmas Carol, And I Am Not Prepared For This Uplifting But Nonetheless Impromptu Christmas Feast
Okay, so I thought it was going to be a mellow Christmas day at home with our single Cornish game hen and three cranberries. But no. Things have been shaken up.
Poem About Your University President’s Completely Reasonable Four Million-Dollar Compensation Package
It's perfectly reasonable. Let us explain.
Including the golden coffin that will house your putrifying corpse until the Day of Judgment.
Things That A Senior Colleague Could Have Said To You Other Than ‘I Like Your Summer Outfit’ When You Ran Into Him
Location: a coffee shop, summer break
In case a gentleman offers a detailed opinion about your tits.
Watching in North Carolina.
THE HAIRPIN — Overheard in Front of a 1918 Alfred Stieglitz Nude Portrait of Georgia O’Keeffe in the Living Modern Exhibition
She's a great artist, but what are her tits like?
MCSWEENEY'S INTERNET TENDENCY — Top Gun’s Maverick Addresses the Application of the Term “Maverick” to Senator John McCain
Maverick is miffed.